Informercial Junkie

I come to you today because I have an addiction. It’s true, friends.

I’m an infomercial junkie!

Try to sell me prime swampland  face to face and I probably won’t bite. But add a half-hour TV time slot, a few flashy graphics, a deep male voice, and a phone number at the bottom of the screen, and I’m lassoed.

 Swamp Trooper


Since childhood I’ve suffered from insomnia. This means I watch a lot of late-night TV. Unless you’re lucky enough to find a cooking show or an episode of Ru Paul’s Drag Queen, you’re stuck watching infomercials.

In my pre-dawn, BC (before coffee) delirium, I’m most susceptible to any of the following:

butt shaping
food lovers diet
less wrinkles
no debt solutions
laser hair removal at home!
teaching my kids a language
helping said kids with math
more sex–yes!
less cellulite
managing stress
arthritis pain
clear skin
hair restoration

However, when the sun blinks its eye over the lip of the land, my mind suddenly looks at these commercials like cheap scams. Sometimes I wake up and find my wallet lying open and the Shark Vacuum infomercial on. Just like that man you nabbed last night at the bar, mornings don’t always make things look better. Especially when the Shark Vacuum shows up in a box on your porch.

Have you ever been lured into the infomercial trap? I’d love to hear what you’ve ordered!

Thanks for reading,


7 comments on “Informercial Junkie

  1. Ok I’ll admit it I have bought a snuggie. I stay up late too.

  2. Haha!! I’ve bought a pasta maker, rotisserie oven, make up and a few exercise DVD’s. I try not to watch the shopping channels at all. lol

  3. I watch them in Spanish and think it doesn’t count if I claim I didn’t understand.

  4. I have watched them and got caught up into them, but thankfully never ordered anything!

  5. No, but I love QVC–still love it even though I got rid of my cable.

  6. Not me but myi mother is so bad! She will call me and I give her a script to follow when she calls to cancel or return items. Bless heri heart, she gets so flustered .

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: